ADHD and how it may be perceived and why access to medicines that make the symptoms more manageable should be re-evaluated

 The opioid epidemic is partially to blame (20% enviormental) and genetics (80% passed down thru familys) 

In my experience, it took me 20 years of suffering from this disorder and not even knowing about it before I was told by a family member that they had been diagnosed with it as well as someone telling me that is it mostly genetic before I researched it and started to analyze all the symptoms and look back into all the problems I've had in the past before I came to my conclusion, because I know my body and life better than anyone.  The hardest part is trying to get other's to understand, especially my family, that trauma of any kind sticks with a person for a long time especially when they are not heard or are judged while not even being heard out by the family they thought they could trust the most and due to their lack of being able to remember so many details that I know happened.  I decided to test my own memory by seeing how many teachers from K-12 that I could remember without anything to help me and I listed 36 and then when I tried to look up a list of these past teachers I couldn't find one but during that search it did help me remember one more (37).  So how many people can remember that many of their teachers from their past?  I know I can easily just go get some of the old yearbooks and verify how many I may have missed but the point is I either have a normal memory or a very very good one compared to the rest of my family.  

    The ADHD that is genetic in my family has went undiagnosed due my father and grandmother being grandiose narcissist's, and my sister being a vulnerable/covert narcissist who plays the victim and they didn't even notice it in the most obvious case of hyperactivity as a child in her own youngest child.  Now imagine having a grandmother and father who only sought out social status and expected other family member's to just serve them instead of noticing the struggles of their own children and even after being told what actions and disorder I have by me still to this day refuse to accept nor even listen to my perspective and side of any past story while also being the most judgmental people as well.  This is how intergenerational trauma is passed down over and over and over but this trauma is merely a disorder that can be managed by medications, you cannot cure it but it can be manageable.  

   I am the best listener and observer of body language and have met about 4 people so far, all of which know they have ADHD but have not sought out treatment or cannot get treatment for one reason or another.  I also know what people who are either unaware or are judgmental might perceive how they act as problem rather than just a disorder.

   Those of you who are unaware of the symptoms I'll start with the symptoms I've seen in others as well as myself in my past first.

- jumping around when talking or seeming to be what judgmental people might think as being scatterbrained is a symptom

- being easily distracted or  inability to focus or sustain focus on tasks.

- being very overly sensitive to any criticism when put in a negative way or in a negative tone.

- Major depression or emotional dysregulation which can be seen as overreacting to with any emotion such as anger, sadness, and even unexplained anger or outbursts in adults.

- Forgetfulness or losing things like keys or other important things needed for daily tasks

- Excessive talking or the inability to listen very long without interrupting

- Fidgeting or pacing in order to be able to think

- Hypervigilance or being very observative in the actions of other (which I believe is a positive rather than negative)

- Being very rule oriented or noticing small details that ofter get missed

Those are just some of the symptoms I have noticed that are the most obvious because in adult ADHD many of these symptoms get internalized.  Now I'll list the rest of the symptoms that doctors should be listening for or noticing due to the opioid epidemic making it 2x more likely than someone gets this disorder if they were taken during pregnancy but they only account for (20%) of cases so imagine how many cases have gone unnoticed until the pandemic caused parents to have to be locked down with their children and finally realizing that their children were suffering from this disorder and when the pandemic hit they relaxed the laws regarding this diagnosis which I believe should be relaxed permanently.  

Here are the other symptoms of ADHD which I may have had or would never see because only the people who have it would know because those who don't lie or are honest with themselves will know.

- short attention span

-difficulty sustaining attention

-fails to vie close attention to details

-does not seem to listen

-does not follow through on instructions and fails to finish tasks

-difficulty organizing tasks and activities

-loses things

-easily distracted

-forgetful in daily activities

-daydreaming or appearing "spacey"

-auditory memory and processing problems

-skips around while reading

-difficulty learning new games or following directions

-easily bored or tuned out

-underachievement relative to potential

Hyperactivity symptoms

-fidgeting, tapping hands and feet or squirming while seated

-leaves seat in situations  where staying seaed is expected

-runs about  or climbs excessively(in children)

-difficulty playing or engaging in leisure activities quietly

-appearing "on the go" or "driven by a motor"

-talks excessively

-restlessness or needs constant motion

-must be moving in order tothink

-trouble sitting still

-internal sense of anxiety or nervousness (internalized as adults)

-diminished need for sleep

-restlessness during sleep (kicks covers off or moves constantly)

Impulsivity Symptoms

-Blurts out answers before question have been completed

-has difficulty awaiting turn

-acts before thinking

-low frustration tolerance

-impatient

-impulsive in words or actions

-excitability

-tendency to seek high stimulation or do many things at once

-trouble resisting temptation

-makes careless mistakes or takes unnecessary risks

Executive and Organizational Symptoms

-Disorganization and difficulty prioritizing tasks

-Poor time management skills

-trouble multitasking and executive dysfunction

-frequent procrastination

-switches around numbers, letters, or words

-tendency to get stuck or worry needlessly

-performance gets worse under pressure

-test anxiety or mind goes blank during tests

-inconsistent work performance

-spends excessive time at work due to ineffeciencies

Emotional Symptoms

-frequent mood swings and emotional dysregulation

-inability to control anger or frustration

-irratibility, low tolerance for frustration and stress

-negative internal feelings

-trouble sustaining relationships

-tendency to be immature, self-centered, or have immature interests

-lack of talking in in a relation ship or trouble with intimacy

-avoids group activies or trouble with authority

-tendency toward addiction

Additional less common symptoms

-learning disabilities or learning problems

-poor handwritng or fine motor coordination difficulties

-history of bedwetting (after age 5)

-chronic problems with self esteem

-frequent misplacing of things

-easily distracted during sex or other intimate activities

-tendency to see conflict or be argumentative

-the harder you try, the worse you performance gets

Now this is a comprehensive list  of all the symptoms and how they may present, many have had to manage theirs without any help or medication because it occurs on a spectrum and many symptoms overlap with autism and even some are narcissistic tendencies, what matters is the frequency and intent behind these behaviors. 

   Just as many disorders these occur on a spectrum and can be hard to diagnose if missed during childhood when a parent fails to notice or like me thinks of ADHD as just hyperactivity symptoms which some can occur in children or later on in adults.  The adult versions are often internalized or they have developed coping mechanisms to keep them under control.