What family's need to do, that cannot communicate with each other

 

Effective communication with dismissive personalities involves employing strategies that encourage open dialogue and active listening. This can help foster understanding and create a more harmonious family dynamic.

Relevant Data:

Dates: Ongoing, as communication is a continuous process.

Characters: Family members with dismissive personalities.

Places: Anywhere that family members interact.

Explanation:

In families where some members have dismissive personalities, communication can become challenging. Dismissive individuals often struggle with empathetic listening and may prioritize their own thoughts or opinions over others'. However, there are several approaches that can promote effective communication and encourage them to listen with the intent to understand.

Create a Safe Environment:

Establishing a safe and non-judgmental space is crucial for effective communication. Encourage all family members to express themselves freely without fear of criticism or invalidation. This can help dismissive personalities feel more comfortable opening up and engaging in meaningful conversations.

Active Listening:

Promote active listening by encouraging family members to give their undivided attention to the speaker. Dismissive individuals may need reminders to focus on what is being said, rather than formulating their own response. Encourage them to reflect on and summarize the speaker's words to ensure understanding.

Validate Feelings and Perspectives:

Dismissive personalities may be more inclined to dismiss or invalidate others' feelings or perspectives. Encourage family members to validate each other's emotions and viewpoints, even if they don't necessarily agree. This helps create an atmosphere of respect and fosters better understanding.

Use "I" Statements:

When expressing concerns or thoughts, encourage family members to use "I" statements instead of accusatory language. This approach helps avoid triggering defensive reactions and promotes a more constructive dialogue. For example, saying, "I feel hurt when you dismiss my ideas without considering them" is more effective than saying, "You always ignore my ideas."

Seek Professional Help:

If communication challenges persist, consider seeking the assistance of a family therapist or counselor. A professional can provide guidance and facilitate productive discussions, helping family members overcome communication barriers and develop healthier dynamics.

Resources:

"Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High" by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan, and Al Switzler.

"Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most" by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen.

"Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life" by Marshall B. Rosenberg.

"The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work" by John M. Gottman and Nan Silver.

Family therapy or counseling services in your local area.

How to change the minds of family who only chose to hear information that backs up their own beliefs

TOPIC: CHANGING MINDS OF FAMILY MEMBERS WITH CONFIRMATION BIAS

Summary:

Changing the minds of family members who only choose to hear information that confirms their own beliefs can be a challenging task. It requires patience, empathy, and effective communication strategies that promote critical thinking and open-mindedness.

Relevant Data:

Dates: Ongoing, as changing minds is a continuous process.

Characters: Family members with confirmation bias.

Places: Anywhere that family members interact.

Explanation:

When family members exhibit confirmation bias, it means they selectively seek out and believe information that aligns with their existing beliefs, while dismissing or ignoring conflicting evidence. Changing their minds requires a thoughtful approach aimed at fostering open-mindedness and critical thinking.

Build Trust and Mutual Respect:

Developing trust and mutual respect is crucial when trying to change someone's mind. Establish a foundation of respect by actively listening to their perspectives without judgment. This helps create a safe space for open dialogue and increases the likelihood of them being receptive to alternative viewpoints.

Find Common Ground:

Identify common values or shared goals that both you and your family members hold. Emphasize these points of agreement to establish a common starting point for discussions. By highlighting shared values, you can present new information or perspectives in a way that resonates with their existing beliefs.

Present Diverse Perspectives:

Introduce your family members to a range of perspectives and evidence that challenge their existing beliefs. Share well-researched articles, documentaries, or books that present different viewpoints in a respectful manner. Encourage them to critically evaluate the information and consider alternative perspectives.

Encourage Critical Thinking:

Promote critical thinking skills by asking thought-provoking questions. Encourage your family members to examine the sources of information they consume, evaluate the credibility of those sources, and consider the potential biases involved. Encourage them to question their own beliefs and explore alternative viewpoints.

Lead by Example:

Model open-mindedness and intellectual humility in your own conversations. Show a willingness to consider different perspectives and be receptive to new information. By demonstrating these qualities, you may inspire your family members to adopt a similar approach.

Be Patient and Respect Boundaries:

Changing minds takes time, and it's important to respect your family members' boundaries. Pushing too hard or becoming confrontational may further entrench their existing beliefs. Instead, maintain a patient and understanding demeanor, allowing them to process information at their own pace.

Resources:

"The Righteous Mind: Why Good People Are Divided by Politics and Religion" by Jonathan Haidt.

"Thinking, Fast and Slow" by Daniel Kahneman.

"The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment" by Eckhart Tolle.

TED Talks on critical thinking, open-mindedness, and cognitive biases.

Online courses or workshops on effective communication and critical thinking skills.

Remember, changing someone's mind is a gradual process, and it may not always be possible. Focus on fostering understanding and respectful dialogue, even if you don't achieve complete agreement.

TOPIC: NEGATIVE TALK ABOUT ABSENT FAMILY MEMBERS

Summary:

Talking negatively about family members when they are not present can have significant emotional and relational consequences. It can create tension, erode trust, and damage the overall dynamics within the family. Understanding the impact of such actions is crucial for fostering healthy relationships.

Relevant Data:

Dates: Ongoing, as negative talk can occur at any time.

Characters: Family members who engage in negative talk, and those who are the subject of such conversations.

Places: Anywhere that family members interact or engage in conversations.

Explanation:

When family members engage in negative talk about each other in their absence, it can have various negative effects on both the individuals involved and the overall family dynamic.

Trust and Emotional Impact:

Talking negatively about absent family members erodes trust within the family. The individuals being spoken about may feel betrayed and hurt upon discovering these conversations. It can lead to feelings of insecurity, self-doubt, and a breakdown in the emotional bonds that hold families together.

Communication Breakdown:

Negative talk can hinder open and honest communication. It creates an atmosphere of secrecy and fear, where family members may be reluctant to express their true thoughts and feelings. This breakdown in communication can prevent issues from being resolved and lead to misunderstandings and conflicts.

Damage to Relationships:

Engaging in negative talk can strain relationships between family members. It fosters an environment of negativity, resentment, and hostility. The individuals being talked about may distance themselves emotionally or even sever ties with family members who consistently engage in such behavior.

Influence on Perception:

Negative talk about absent family members can shape the perception of others within the family. It may create biased viewpoints and influence how individuals perceive and interact with each other. This can perpetuate misunderstandings and further strain relationships.

Impact on Family Unity:

Frequent negative talk can weaken the sense of unity and belonging within the family. It creates divisions and cliques, fostering an unhealthy environment where trust and support are compromised. Family gatherings and events may become tense and strained as a result.

Breakdown of Confidentiality:

Talking negatively about absent family members violates the principle of confidentiality and privacy within family relationships. It erodes the sense of safety and confidentiality that should exist among family members, making it difficult for individuals to share their vulnerabilities and seek support.

It is important for family members to recognize the negative impact of such behavior and strive to foster a culture of respect, empathy, and open communication within the family.

Resources:

"Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most" by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen.

"Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High" by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan, and Al Switzler.

"Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life" by Marshall B. Rosenberg.

Family therapy or counseling services in your local area.

Online resources and articles on healthy communication and conflict resolution within families.

I would ask them :  First, what impact has the physical abuse even a chest bump or push and verbal abuse aka scream at, belittling, demeaning, and overall dismissal of anything that was brought up during the traumatic events and even a year later, has it had on me?

If I hear voices, what do they say, what do they tell me to do, how many are there, have you ever even took the time to ask or to let me speak long enough for you to ever to even know what I need or what's best for me at all?

What impact did you letting me catch the criminal mischief charge for taking back my mother's fence have or could possibly have on my life if you continue to dismiss anything and everything that was important to me at the time?  Do you think you have portrayed me in a way that makes me look honest, nice, and a great active listener or has your actions make me look more like a liar and a criminal, and if these actions continue, a felon simply because you are too busy, too tired, say you've heard it all but you honestly haven't llstened to a single bit of what I've said or you would know, I'm smart enough to know exactly what I need.... positive supportive people around me which moving will remedy and we will see how well I do when away from the denial and dismissal of my family.

I'd recommend watching 2 ted talks :  How to find truth in a post truth world, and 10 ways to have a better conversation, and if your not busy watch my youtube, read my blog and honestly try to understand for the first time.

The only thing that angers me is the dismissive behaviors I receive like eye rolls, or the blame game, then the hypocritical rants like bringing up the past of 15 years ago and playing the victim then when I bring up a mere year ago, all I hear is "ITS IN THE PAST" so whose in denial and unwilling to  work thru these issues?

Which family members actively talk badly about most of the other family members, and be honest with yourself....